My name is Madoff the Dog. Not he of the elaborate Ponzi schemes, an actual dog. Well, a chihuahua.

I was born at a tiny gas station in the Alpujarran mountains in Andalusia, Southern Spain during the coldest winter since 1923. Or so local lore would have it.

It was cold enough for me to dream of the the scantily clad lady, seductively nibbling a water mellon on the garage wall. She seemed, well, warm.

So when I saw an Orange car pulling up  with a big red B on the back, rather than the usual Spanish E, I felt my moment had come. B. Brazil! The nibbling girl on the wall was from Brazil. I, too, could be munching kibble from a coconut! So I flashed on the charm on the unsuspecting female occupant of the car, bit of excessive tailwagging followed by a longing look and,  this never fails, my large inky black puppy dog eyes with a hint of a tear brought home the bacon. 

Yet as I was whisked off in the orange car, I found out that B stands for Belgium.
So not Brazil. Actually, Belgium is the absolute opposite of Brazil. No scantily clad ladies, no warmth. No water mellons either.

Belgium as a country is about as exotic as supermarket kibble. Which is also what their crown prince looks like. Something the cat dragged in, but on second thoughts judged too boring to toy with. The cold dead frog you humans step in early in the morning: that´s Belgium. 

(to be continued)

Popularity: 100% [?]

Technorati Tags: chihuahua puppies, chihuahuas, chiuaua, poppy, puppies